Thursday, July 24, 2008

Happy?

I’m not really sure what has struck me but I’m not exactly me, at least not for the last few days. I’m in this really weird mood or phase. I get upset, frustrated and even lose my temper more easily. I whine, I complain and then i make a 360 turn reverting to my old self like nothing took place previously. I can’t figure out what has triggered this in me.

My days have been pretty routine for a long time. Nothing new ever takes place here. I’ve not had any good nor upsetting news so why should I feel this way?

It’s a nagging feeling inside, like an itch you scratch but to no relief. I’m not angry but I do feel the temperature rising pretty damn fast which scares me because I don’t have a temper to begin with. And I have no intention of developing one. But I don’t like the little devil inside me.

And then it hit me. I may be up and about (very very little actually, but that’s another story altogether) and sitting at home, kononnya chillexing (chilling + relaxing), I hang out with my friends but there is one important ingredient missing. And I feel that that could be causing the tiny turbulations of rebellions eating me inside, thinning down my walls, chewing into my heart. I’m not happy.

8 comments:

Johnny Ong said...

just go out and take good stroll. u just need some time off from the usual routines that could be taking a heavy toll.

Nkw@i said...

hmm....try to go to beach? =D
I guess you need some peace and calm time ;)

Azzam?? said...

there's a void huh?? of something that used to be there.. =) in time the gap will be smaller, but it can never be closed.. life is about coping with that, but not immediately that is.. =D do take care!

Kulvinder Kaur said...

johnny ong: yeah, the routine is making me a rut.

nkw@i: i think i'm just plain bored of having too much time doing nothing :(

azzam: thanks azzam. i hope things will be better soon.

keen said...

i`m in no position to give any words of encouragement. But if you`re not happy as well, that makes to of us. And two is always better than one :) (i think)

we`ll get through this in no time :)

Ohkulala said...

keen: yeah, i hope we'll get through this and turn out just fine :)

[YeOp] said...

hayya kulvinder! sounds emotional. what happenned?

p/s: see u during convo as well! :)

Ohkulala said...

yeop: well, just an emo time i guess but i'm all good now. see you soon!