Saturday, June 7, 2008

The Interview

Last week, I had an email that made my heart stop. I thought there must be a serious mistake. So with my heart beating like crazy, I checked the email and to my surprise, I was called for the final stage interview with company S. Now the reason I was so surprised was because results were suppose to be out 2 weeks upon the 3rd round of interviews (and this was in the first week of april). And since I didn’t get any reply, it was safe to assume I didn’t make it through. Furthermore, the previous interview was quite the experience to say the least.

The interview went alright. It is hard to say whether it went great, I know it didn’t go badly but I do not like being unsure. It was somewhere in the middle. Unlike Xena who managed to terrorise me, the interviewer (my potential boss) was rather nice and calm. However, his parting words struck a chord in my heart. Instead of feeling awesome, I came out with a cloud looming over my head. I didn’t feel as confident as when I entered the room. I am beginning to doubt myself. Am I giving myself too much credit all this while? Can I do this? Is the immense pressure and horrendous workload versus the good money worth it at the end of the day?

These are questions I still do not have definite answers to and I don’t like being in this situation. I like being sure and knowing things. But the vagueness of this situation is slowly eating me inside. Unlike my pet interview where I was very sure went superbly well, I can’t say the same with this interview. I am missing the WOW factor I was looking for. I just don’t know. I don’t like not knowing.

On the other hand, on the very same day, I saw something I’ve not seen in a very very long time. I liked what I saw; it has a feel good factor about it. The emotions that come with this is pretty nice. Do I see something in the future? Perhaps. But this is something I don’t mind not knowing for now. Let nature run its course and I’ll see what time brings as the future unfolds.

1 comment:

Queer Ranter said...

So when will you know?